Break ins, Baby Dragon, Husband Man and due date...

Ethan often says I have lovely ability to always see/assume the best in the world that sometimes borders on naivety. For example I posted our address on Facebook the other day thinking that it was okay as no one would come to Spain to stalk us or whatever, Ethan immediately convinced me it was a bad idea and I deleted it. There are lots of other examples that admittedly I can't think of right now so I might add them as I think of them... But I generally like to disagree with Ethan's opinion on this however over the last couple of days I've realised he might actually be right!  

A few days ago Ethan and I were having lunch and we heard this strange bang sound by our front door and then it happened again. Ethan went to the door to check it out and had a look through the little eye hole to find a man crouched by the door! He covered up the eye hole as he saw/heard Ethan go to the door and then RAN down the stairs. When we looked to see what he was doing we discovered holes that had been drilled/hammered into the door and door frame in two out of the three areas where the locks were on the door! Safe to say we were pretty freaked out and have started checking the door at most noises now..

The good news is we have the world's best landlord! They arranged for a new (VERY sturdy) door to be put in and are paying a LOT of money for an alarm system to be added as well! We would have been happy with just the lock being replaced but they have gone above and beyond!

However it did make me realise that maybe the world isn't quite as much of a nice place as I thought it was. I thought we were completely safe in our lovely apartment and would never have imagined that someone would try to break in! The damage that was done to the door suggests that it was done over a period of time rather than just the other day that made us wonder if the person that had done it had been watching our comings and goings so as to be able to 'work' undisturbed. In reality that probably isn't the case but it has made me very aware of the information I put online, particularly with having a blog. I use to think the whole thing with having pseudonyms for family members names was a bit over the top, especially for me as the majority of people that read my blog are people that know me well anyway so when Baby Dragon was born I was going to use his name on blog as I just didn't think it was a big deal. But now I think why take the risk, espeically not with our beautiful Baby Dragon! So post birth he will remain being called Baby Dragon and Ethan from now on will become Husband Man, which is a phrase I've used for a while, there is no reason behind it other than it just came out one day (it was actually sweet husband man, but that's a bit gushy to be using all the time here...) So I'm going to have to go back through my old posts and change his name in them all at some point.

In other news it's my due date today. No need to ask if I've had the baby yet, I'm not planning on keeping it a secret from the rest of the world, no news means there is no news...    

The final countdown!

Our due date is a week today!! It still doesn't seem real, I think it's because it's something so life changing that I just can't imagine until it happens as it is going to be COMPLETELY different to anything I have ever experienced in my life before.

I had a dream last night that he came and it was so wonderful and cute! He was the smiliest little baby you've ever seen :) It made me even more impatient for him to come! That said I think I'm starting to get a cold, Ethan has had manflu for the last week and I'd managed to completely avoid it and now he's been better for the last 2 days I'm starting to get it! Doesn't really make much sense, but it would be better if that cleared up first over the next couple of days then Baby Dragon arrive. No one wants a new mum or baby with a cold!

In the last week I've been craving chocolate and general baked things like brownie and tiffin like nothing else! I think part of the reason is that I feel I should make the most of indulging now and then when baby dragon comes I can be super healthy, then indulge again at Christmas on all the wonderful British things that I have been missing out on! Either way, I've eaten a lot of chocolate this week! 

Other than my high chocolate consumption life has been pretty uneventful, no 'I THINK I'M GOING INTO LABOUR' moments recently. I've been doing quite a bit of walking in the hope that it will encourage Baby Dragon to come but no success yet. We are going to the Valencia Open 500 tomorrow, an ATP tennis tournament which we're massively looking forward to so maybe the excitement from the matches might get him moving... We cannot wait to finally have our little baby!!

We went to a little cafe last week and enjoyed a little montaditos (small sandwich thing)

Not quite chocolate, but still scrummy!

A baking nightmare!

I have a new blog! It's new and beautiful and 100 times better than this one but I'm not going to start using it until after Baby Dragon is born, you'll understand why when I do start using it. I'm also still in the process of transferring all my old posts on to it so it's not quite ready yet.

My reason for mentioning is that when Ethan started designing it for me (he's a very talented man) I told him when we moved to Spain I would write a post each week featuring the recipe of something I'd baked. However, this definitely hasn't happened. Baking is a nightmare here!

One problem with baking is the fact that we don't have any weighing scales here and because we are only here for a short amount of time I don't see any point in buying a set that we only have to leave behind anyway. This has led me to using CUPS when cooking! I feel this goes against everything I have ever believed :l But I know it's only temporary at least...

Another problem is that it's borderline impossible to find the same ingredients in Spain that you get in the UK. It took two attempts to buy yeast and even then I think it's a slightly strange version, yesterday we ended up buying some liquorice tasting liquid rather than golden syrup and had to buy hot chocolate powder instead of cocoa powder as that's all they had. It's all quite distressing really!

The main issue is our oven doesn't work properly! When you turn the main oven on the grill automatically comes on too so within no time at all you have a burnt top of whatever you're cooking, and an underbaked middle and bottom! This has led to a number of quite burnt dinners to start with, but we're slowly getting accustomed to it. However it does mean that it is impossible to actually cook anything like cakes and meat as the middle would just be completely raw still!

The first lasagne we cooked with a burnt top!

Due to these very unfortunate and distressing problems, baking and I have had to come to a compromise. But thankfully we have had some slight success despite these terrible afflictions... Yesterday we made tiffin which didn't need to use the oven at all (you can find the recipe here), and brownie works quite well as the middle is suppose to be gooey! (Although I do have to cook it for a couple of minutes in the microwave too).

Lets hope Italy is a little more baking friendly as I want to bake!

We think we know best...

Prior to moving to Spain we spent a long time looking at flats online and found quite a few. The one that stood out the most to us was a very reasonable price, seemed close enough to Ethan's university and had EVERYTHING included like towels, bedding etc. Because there were quite a few flats available and it was quite a big decision we decided we should pray about whether that flat was the one we should rent. We did that and both felt good about it so we bit the bullet and paid the deposit and first months rent etc. 

Once we had done this different things kept on coming up that made me worry that maybe we had been a bit hasty with our decision and should maybe have looked around a bit more. For example, it was on the fifth floor with no lift, which I thought being heavily pregnant I might really struggle with, church was a good 45-50 minute walk away which again I thought would be pretty tough and it was quite along way from the beach (certainly not walking distance) which seemed quite a shame when living in a city with a beach! Also we didn't even consider which health centre we would come under, where the closest shopping centre was and whether we'd be able to cope with having to walk everywhere if these things weren't close by.

It turns out my worrying was silly, we had prayed about it and had felt that we should rent that flat. Although we hadn't taken everything into consideration, Heavenly Father knew what we would need when we were here and had us covered far more than I could have imagined.

- The 4 flights of stairs are really not a big deal, they make your legs ache a little bit but even with my extra baby weight that I'm carrying I can still go up them all without stopping and my body has got a lot more use to them.

- There is a bus stop 30 seconds from our house that goes straight to where the chapel is which is amazing, and we have actually walked to church twice which is quite a pleasant (though long) walk.
- There are only two trams that go directly to the beach, as it happens one of these trams has a stop at the end of our road so we can go straight to the beach really easily!
- The health centre is two streets behind us (a 3 minute walk), with two of the lovelies midwives who love taking all of our many questions about how giving birth works in Spain and ask if I have understood what they have said to Ethan in Spanish.
- The hospital we come under is the newest in the city and is therefore one of the best, and they also happen to have a British midwife who works there, so our midwife at the health centre has said they will arrange for me to have her if she is on duty when I go!
- There is a taxi rank right next to our flat with at least 3 taxis permanently waiting, so we know we can get a taxi to the hospital as soon as we need to.
- There is a Mercadona (A supermarket about the size of your typical Aldi) on our street and a big shopping centre with a Carrefour (the continental Tesco equivalent) 15 minutes (10 for Ethan) walk away that has a big variety of shops like clothing, homeware, sports, food etc.
- The flat is big enough that my family of 5 were able to come and stay with us for 6 days and it wasn't cramped at all and they all had their own bed (except poor Pete) and more of our family and friends are able to come and visit us over the next few months and have rooms to themselves! 

In conclusion we had no idea really when we 'booked' our flat just how perfect it was going to be for us here, but Heavenly Father knew our needs. I'm so grateful that we are able to pray and get answers to our questions and that we have a Heavenly Father who loves and cares about us so much and takes care of our needs often before we even knew what those needs were!

The beautiful sunset from out kitchen

  

Two and a bit weeks to go!

I've not written a blog post in a little while, mostly because I have about 10 things I want to write about and I couldn't decide which to start with first... so I didn't start with any!

So I thought I'd do a short and sweet one instead. This Friday will mark the two week count down to baby dragon being born! How crazy! Part of me thinks where has the time gone and the other part thinks two weeks still feels ages away. That said, when we were at our midwife appointment last week Ethan said we had three weeks to go, to which she replied 'Or one, it would be quite normal'. Admittedly I'd love it if he decided to come this week, I feel I've done my fair share of waiting now, although seeing as both Ethan and I were 10 days late I'm preparing myself to go over due. The exciting thing is that in Spain they induce you after a week of being over due rather then 12 days in the UK (from what I remember), so at least we don't have to wait as long as we might have done back in the UK.

Over the last couple of weeks I've been convincing myself that I'm going into labour. The other day my back started hurting like I use to get with period pains which is apparently a sign of labour for some people and I was like 'I'M GOING INTO LABOUR!' and then it died down and that was the end of that excitement haha

So I currently have nothing to report on any baby news other than he seems just as happy and fidgety as ever, lets hope he decides to make an appearance soon! (Ethan and I decided this Friday would be great then Ethan wouldn't have to miss any lectures for the first couple of days, although I don't think babies really take convenience into consideration when they decide to arrive...)

                                                            A little bit of life at 37 weeks :)

Are we too busy to notice the beautiful things in life?

Ethan and I went to Madrid this weekend in celebration of his birthday. We only saw a very small amount of the city but it was amazing, the buildings are beautiful and the plazas (squares) were filled with entertainers like in London which was such fun!

With the heat and being 35 weeks pregnant, we took the occasional little break to sit down and rest our (my) tired feet. Whilst walking around the city we came across a group of four men playing the violin, keyboard, cello and double base. Together they played well known classical pieces which sounded beautiful so we decided we would have one of our little breaks and enjoy the music. We ended up staying for over an hour! (We probably would have stayed longer but they finished playing).

While we were enjoying the music Ethan and I also watched the different people that went by and both noticed something interesting. There were lots of families with young children that walked past and almost every time a young child would walk past they would slow down and only turned away from the musicians once their necks could not turn back enough to see them. Often however, the parents didn't seem to notice the child's reaction, let alone notice the music. This was the same for the majority of adults, they didn't seem to notice the beautiful music at all as they were too busy getting on with what they were doing (shopping for most people). The children, though being very young (often around 2 or 3) seemed to notice that something beautiful was being created by those musicians.

The difference between the children and adults got me thinking, I wonder if we allow ourselves to be so busy that we don't appreciate the beautiful things that our around us. Ethan and I were in no rush and the young children were not concerned about quickly going from one shop to the next. There were also a number of older people who would stop and listen for a while. 

I wonder if the busy lives that we lead in this generation have caused us to 'tune out' the beautiful things that the world has to offer, particularly with the distractions of mobile phones etc. I wonder if we have taught ourselves to get on with our hectic lifestyles rather than to slow down and be able to open our eyes and ears to all the beautiful things that we are surrounded by but don't let ourselves appreciate. I wonder what things I've missed out on that could have enriched my life just that little bit more because I was too 'busy' to take the time to notice it. It reminds me of the article I read* about a professional violinist who busked in disguise in a busy American metro. Normally people would pay a lot of money to attend his concerts, however out of the 1100 people that walked past him only 7 stopped to listen to this FREE performance. I bet there were a good few people who kicked themselves for not stopping to listen to him once it came out in the papers. It just goes to show what we miss out on when rush from one thing to the next. I know I'm going to try and take life a little slower (or maybe stay taking it slow, pregnancy seems to do the slowing down for you) and let myself appreciate the beautiful things the world has to offer :) 

* this is the article http://www.theguardian.com/music/tomserviceblog/2007/apr/18/joshuabellnoordinarybusker

This is a big post office apparently!

Us enjoying the music

Baby on a budget - maternity clothes

I don't like spending money on clothes, they always seem far more expensive than they're actually worth which is why a lot of my clothes are things that I've bought in sales. Call me cheap but there is something very satisfying about knowing that some of your favourite outfits cost less than someone else paid for just a top.

So pregnancy and a growing belly potentially posed a problem for me as maternity clothes are even more expensive than regular clothes yet I'm only going to wear them for like 6 months! However over the last 8 months of being pregnant I've discovered ways of having clothes that fit without having to break the bank, so I thought I'd share them :) 

1. Just because its not a maternity item doesn't mean you can't wear it whilst pregnant. 

In fact the majority of my every day clothes that I have worn throughout being pregnant have been clothes I already owned that happen to accommodate a big bump (right now I'm wearing all normal clothes just with the addition of a belly band). I actually haven't bought a single maternity specific top, although I did buy a top that was a slightly bigger size that I saw in a sale, I didn't need it but it was pretty :) 

Again, no maternity clothes, only a
belly band. I've the had shorts since
 I was about 14!

None of these are maternity clothes, just stretchy!

2. The essentials
In my opinion there are only a couple of items of clothing you really need in maternity size. The first is a belly band, it meant I could wear any of my normal trousers whilst having a big bump, and I'm still using it now at 8 months pregnant! (There is also something very liberating about walking round with your trousers undone and no one else knowing...). That said, a pair of maternity trousers or two are definitely nice to have, they are so comfy! With being pregnant over summer and in Spain I decided pretty quickly that I would need some cooler clothes than trousers (we've been in Spain nearly 3 weeks and I've only worn trousers twice for midwife appointments, (I didn't fancy lifting up a dress). So for me, and anyone else pregnant when it's hot, my essentials have been a couple of dresses, but again these don't have to break the bank if you check out point 3. Likewise if I was pregnant during winter a jumper or two would probably be my essential rather than dresses. I also thought I'd need things like a maternity swimming costume, turns out my regular one still fits fine (it's just a bit more effort getting on and off!). Another VERY important essential is a couple of maternity bras, my ribs would have died without them and they are 100x more comfortable than underwire bras when pregnant! 

Maternity dress, turns out I don't have a good photo of my favourite dress.

3. Maternity clothing still have sales! 

My two favourite maternity dresses I bought in the sale for literally a quarter of the price they should have been! I also got my favourite maternity trousers in the sale too. The only difficulty with shopping in the sale is that they are very time specific, which is where a little forward thinking can come in handy. We started 'trying to conceive' in January, the same time a all the big sales, so I thought why not have a look at some maternity things in which I found my 2 favourite dresses. There is always the risk of buying things in advance that you'll go off them or you'll buy more than you need etc. I guess it's all a matter of being realistic about what you'll need and not going crazy just because its a sale.

Maternity dress that was in the sale

Favourite maternity trousers for £10! (not that you can really see them very well)

4. You don't have to get maternity specific clothes.

With many clothes, particularly tops, you can just get a bigger size than your pre-pregnancy size and they fit over your bump a treat whist costing a fraction of the price! 

Admittedly before writing the post I thought I had more points than just 4, but they are 4 quite useful points in my opinion. They just go to show that being pregnant doesn't have to cost the earth. In a few months time I may do another 'Baby on a budget' about things you need to buy in preparation for a baby as that is something that people go way over the top with when they don't need to, however I figured I should probably wait until baby dragon arrives otherwise I will probably end up adding to it or changing it slightly. So you have that to look forward too! ;) 

Sleep!

Over the last couple of weeks I think I have given the impression that I dislike being pregnant. Obviously it isn't quite a comfortable as not being pregnant, but I don't actually dislike it. I think it's treated me very kindly so far in all aspects such as not being sick, not having weird cravings, not being too achey etc. bar one... Sleep!

The problem is sleep seems to then affect all aspects of life. Since the beginning of summer when we had the long beautiful heat wave in the UK I think I've averaged about 5 or 6 hours sleep a night, which is a bit less than I'd like really. For some reason as soon as my feet get hot (which is VERY easily) I can't sleep, no matter how tired I am.

So being in Spain has provided some sleeping issues. I now count falling asleep at 3am a goodnight sleep, there is definitely something wrong with that! In the last week I had 4 hours sleep, followed by 3, which turns out is not enough to keep you emotionally stable... I ended up spending the next two days in tears over anything, often for no reason at all which was quite confusing for Ethan!

The good news is my body seems to have adapted to getting 5 hours sleep a night and I actually function pretty happily and normally the next day on it. So I figure that as frustrating and tiring the non sleeping is, I am getting good practice for when baby dragon arrives. And who knows, maybe I'll actually get slightly more sleep when he arrives because my hot-feet-that-keep-you-awake-all-night will hopefully die down once I'm not pregnant, so although I'll be waking up at all times of the night I might actually fall asleep between feeds etc! (Although I can admit now that it is quite a high hope thinking I may get more sleep...)

Resting on the beach seems a reasonable substitute for lack of sleep during the night!

Pregnancy glow? I'm not so convinced...

Everyone always talks about this pregnancy glow where your hair looks thick and shiney and your skin is glowing. It's a time when you embrace the natural wonders of being female as your body changes beautifully to create a new life.

However I don't feel like that. My feet ache all the time and I'm constantly exhausted as I can't sleep during the night. I can't even put my shoes on properly as I can hardly bend to reach my toes! I definitely don't feel like I'm glowing in anyway.

We've been making the most of the beautiful sunshine here by going to the beach quite a lot, which I realised led me to have a 'pregnant lady moment' yesterday. This involved me having a little break down over the fact that I felt like a beached whale compared to the rest of the world, particularly because literally all the Spanish females could be swimwear models (bar the old ladies that sunbathe topless) then there is me with my big belly who can't even lay on the beach properly!

After my little break down Ethan reassured me wonderfully but it did make me decide that pregnancy really doesn't feel as beautiful and wonderful a people like to claim it is. Since being pregnant I've put a couple of photos online of my bump in which people have said I look great, glowing etc. but in reality that is 3 photos to cover 7 and a half months. We've taken a lot more photos of me and my bump and I look as rough as I feel in them! Yes it's a miracle, but not an attractive feeling one.

This is more how I feel!

This isn't how pregnancy feels

Vivo en Espana

We are in Spain!! It was so weird getting on the plane knowing the next time we will be in the UK (Christmas) we will have a little baby with us!

Our apartment
 Is amazing! We knew it was going to be quite big from online but it's about triple the size of our old flat in Cardiff! But it's perfect because it means when our family (and friends) come to stay with us there is plenty of room :) For the last 4 months we have been nomads basically, moving from one place to another and staying with other people and so it is SO nice being able to have our own space again and be able to actually unpack our belongings :) The 4 flights of stairs haven't been half as bad as I was expecting either. I thought I would have to have a break half way up but it turns out they really aren't that bad, although you can feel they are good for the thighs...

Heat + pregnancy is not the best
It is still so warm here, particularly as the heat seems to rise up to our flat! For some reason the heat seems to make my feet really restless at night which keeps me awake, this was bad enough in the UK heat let alone Spanish heat! However I discovered if I go to bed with a wet towel over my feet I manage to fall asleep after a while. I've also discovered I have sweat glands in places I never knew existed... Ethan and I often go for walks in the evening and by the time we're back having scaled the 4 flights of stairs you feel like you've just been swimming! (Nice...). The heat has also made my feet swell a little bit which is a strange feeling. But other than that the temperature is awesome! We went to the beach on Saturday and it was so nice to be able to relax in the sun and the sea was such a good temperature with amazing waves!

The beach! (well next to it as you can tell from the rather unclothed man...)

The language
I had a very gentle ease into the language as we were picked up from the airport by a Ukrainian man who didn't speak Spanish too well so he spoke quite slowly and used words that I could understand so I was feeling quite confident in my understanding of Spanish. However, we went to church yesterday and they spoke SO fast! All their words blurred into one pretty much. But that's just something to get use to, I'll be fluent in no time ;)

Baby Dragon
We managed to bring almost everything over, car seat, carry cot, 0-3 month clothes etc through a company Send My Bags which was SO much cheaper than taking it all as luggage on the plane. The boxes were also padded out with nappies from the gorgeous nappy cake that Amber made! (Check out the baby shower post for pictures). We were also able to get all our health care sorted today without any problems at all which was a relief! We are now registered at a Health Center (like a GP Surgery) and met with the midwives who gave us an appointment for an antenatal check up straight away! The people were all so lovely and made everything very straight forward and easy. They also said the hospital that we come under to give birth is the best one in Valencia, so it's all looking pretty good so far! :)

My bump as of today, 32 weeks and 3 days

Baby Showers (plural!)

In the last couple of months we have had not one but TWO baby showers for our baby dragon!

The first one we had was a surprise one organised by some of the lovely members of the Cardiff ward. It was funny because I had no idea until the day that something had been planned, despite little clues accidentally being left in the lead up to the party! It was such fun, we played some hilarious games and enjoyed some good food and it was lovely spending time with some of the members of the ward before we left Cardiff.

The beautiful cake made by my beautiful YW Emily!

Which tasted amazing! (The other slice was Ethan's...)

We then had a second baby shower/leaving party in Leighton Buzzard (where my parents live). We didn't really need another baby shower but we wanted to have a little leaving party to see some of our friends and family before we go to Spain and I really wanted to make some of the cute food you get at baby showers (according to pinterest at least, I've never attended a baby shower before...).

Cakepops!

Me trying to eat a cakepop...

We had an entertaining quiz that consisted of questions about babies in Spain, the names of baby animals (who knew a baby platypus was called a puggle or puggler as Ethan called it) and then questions about Ethan and I as babies, such as what was our most memorable tantrum about and how much did we weigh when we were born.

One of the games we played



On the event on facebook we had put that it would end at 11
which we thought was quite late and people would probably
end up leaving earlier. However everyone seemed to have
a pretty good time and ended up staying till quite a bit later
which was great, the only thing is Ethan and I are not quite the
party animals we use to be and we got out partied! Haha
 (I've not been soleeping well at all in the last month, and
 accidentally wake Ethan up a lot with my fidgeting etc. so both
 of us get so tired recently). I felt really bad that we actually
left before some of out guests but I figured they must be
 having a good time for them to still be there so everyone
 must be happy... :)

Gorgeous nappy cake that my best friend Amber made!

A little early insight into parenthood

When we first found out we were pregnant I felt that all we had to do was reach the 12 week mark (the likelihood of a miscarriage goes down greatly after 12 weeks) and everything was completely smooth sailing with nothing to worry about from there.

That was until I was in the car with friend who mentioned someone they knew who had had a still born, which made me realise that anything could happen from that point until the baby was born regardless of whether it was past the 12 weeks.

Then I heard about someone whose toddler died unexpectedly in an accident which made me realise just how fragile life is. Nothing is guaranteed. As a mother or someone who cares very much for another there is always the constant worry that something is going to happen to that individual that you care so much about. 

But then there is the issue of how cautious should you be. Do you make your child live life in cotton wool and not take any risks like climbing trees or go to the park with friends without adult supervision? Or do you let them explore and find their own boundaries? I think that is a very difficult balance to find for a parent and is something that is different for each child let alone family. It's something I'm yet to decide on. Part of me feels children are often good at knowing their limits and what they feel safe doing, the other part says there is no way my little boy will be joining my dad and brother in climbing huge oak trees with makeshift ladders made from rope and wood and all the other crazy things that they get up to! 

I think part of the issue is there is such a dualism in the media regarding children. Half the time you hear about how children have been stopped from doing things like having conker fights and the newspapers all state what an outrage this is and how it is an example of health and safety gone mad. Then as soon as something goes wrong and a child gets injured in any way parents are criticised for being irresponsible and negligent. For example parents have been criticised for not letting their children go and play outside and doing things like playing football in a park like children used to do*. Yet the parents of April Jones who went missing from a park whilst playing with friends in 2012 were criticised by some for being negligent and irresponsible parents for allowing their child to play without adult supervision.

 In reality I think there is no winning, you just have to decide what is best for you regardless of other people as there is always someone who thinks they know better...    

*There is an old but very good article on the BBC that
 criticises over cautious parents http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7540076.stm 

The World's Best Flapjack Recipe

In school we had the most amazing cakes made by one of the loveliest ladies I know. Honestly, every single cake was just DIVINE to the point that once I had finished 6th Form I got my younger sister to buy me a cake from school every now and then. My sister also loved the cakes which led to her asking for the recipe for the flapjacks. I only discovered today that she had this recipe and so the first thing I did was try it out!

Ingredients:

280g/10oz Rolled Oats

200g/7oz Margarine/Butter

100g/3.5oz Brown Sugar

180g/7oz Golden Syrup

1. Melt margarine, brown sugar and golden syrup in a pan.

2. Take off heat and mix in oats.

3. Spoon onto a tray* and flatten down.

4. Bake in the oven at 180C for 15-20 minutes (until golden on top).

5. Cut while still warm.

6. Enjoy!

When I tried the recipe I was a bit impatient with the oven and put them in before it had reached 180 degrees which meant that they had to cook for longer, causing the flapjack to be a little drier and crumblier than it should have been. So lesson learnt, be patient. That said, my family two or three pieces each and my sister said they were the best homemade flapjacks she had ever tasted!

Flapjack is such a quick and easy treat and this recipe is the best! (In my opinion at least...)

*the tray size depends on how thick you like the flapjack, 9x9 inch would make slightly fatter flapjacks, a larger one would make thinner ones.

Year Abroad - Q&A

It is exactly 2 weeks today until we move to Spain for 5 months! I decide to mark this occasion I would do a question and answer style blog post as people seem to ask the same questions alllll the time! 

1. Will we be having our baby abroad?

We are, with the European Health Card we are entitled to the same state health care as the Spanish and their health care is pretty good. We have got the forms we need from the NHS that means they will fund our health care over there. I'll admit there was a point where I had read a few things online from British mums who had given birth in Spain and they had had experiences that were quite different from what is usual in the UK which made me panic and led to us looking into all the different options in coming back the the UK to have the baby (none of which were either practical or cheap). However after talking about all the options with Ethan we have decided to stay having the baby in Spain, none of the experiences I read online had any effect on the healthtiness/safety of the delivery, all of the babies were born healthy, it was just the experience was different to what you would expect in the UK as obviously it is a different culture that has slightly different ways of doing things. And so because we're aware of the fact that they do things slightly differently in Spain we are prepared for that unlike the women online and so are very happy with the plan of giving birth in Spain.

2. Have we got where we are going to be living sorted?

Yep. We have a lovely flat a few minutes from the sea which comes FULLY furnished (crockery, towels, bedding etc.) so we don't have to bring over/buy anything for the flat which saves us so much money! It also is very spacious which I think will be quite nice for having a newborn in, and has a spare bedroom with 2 beds and a sofa bed which means that our family and friends can come and visit us really easily as they only need to sort flights! (My family had their flights booked before we even had ours booked!)  

3. How are you going to cope knowing no Spanish?

I have actually learnt Spanish for 4 years in total and so although I'm by no means fluent I know the basics to be able to get by and can understand enough to be able to cope. So with that I plan to pick up as much as I can while we're there and who knows, maybe I'll be fluent by the time we leave... ;)

4. What will you be doing there?

Me - Having a baby and getting a tan. Ethan - he has a university placement at the University of Valencia for the Autumn semester (then a placement at the University of Pavia in Italy for the spring semester). However because you learn a language best by being immersed in the culture, he only has to take half the number of modules than his other 3 years of his course so we will be spending as much time as we can enjoying the Spanish culture with our little baby dragon :)

5. Will your baby have a Spanish name?

Most likely not, although we haven't decided on any names yet, we have a few we like but are going to wait until the baby is born to see what he suits best. Although it would be fun to give him a Spanish name it would just be very out of place in the UK, however there are a few Italian names that are a bit more 'acceptable' in the UK but they might be used for later children, we shall see...

6. Are you scared about moving to abroad for a year/having a baby abroad?

Nope, we are so excited! It's a logistical nightmare working out how to get our things and all the things we have for the baby like a pushchair, car seat etc from the UK to Spain, Spain to Italy and Italy back the the UK, although we've got it all sorted out for taking to Spain at least :) But other than that I don't think there is actually a better time to have a baby as financially we are in a very good position thanks to student finance and Erasmus and it will be so lovely for Ethan as he will have twice as much time to be able to spend with the baby and support me than if he was at uni in the UK and 10 times more time than when he's graduated with a full time job.

7. What about your degree?

I've just finished my second year, I'm taking a year out which is all sorted and approved and then we are both finishing our final year the next year. My course has very few contact hours so in reality baby dragon will only need to go to the uni day care for a couple of hours a week. If people can go back to work full time after 6 weeks, finishing a practically part time degree after a year is not going to be an issue :)  

I'm sure there are probably more questions that people ask, but I can't think of them right now and I think they get less interesting too so I shall stop there for the greater good of everyone... :)

 

Tiffin!

As many may know, I love baking! I love making pretty cupcakes and even use to sell them before I started university. I find it very therapeutic baking anything and making them pretty! I also love Pinterest for having SO many recipes, the only problem is they are pretty much all American, using American measurements and American ingredients. After spending many hours whilst baking flicking from measurement conversion charts and Google trying to find alternative ingredients that we have here in the UK, I decided I will write a post or two of my favourite recipes suited to a British Baker!

So today's recipe is Tiffin! Which is a fridge tray 'cake' covered in chocolate.

Ingredients:

10.5oz/300g Milk Chocolate (a mix of white chocolate and milk is the best)

8oz/225g Rich Tea Biscuits

4oz/110g Butter/Margarine (I generally use margarine personally)

2 tbsp Golden Syrup

2 tbsp Caster/Granulated Sugar

4 tsp Cocoa Powder

1 handful of raisins (optional, or could add marshmellows for a rocky road type cake or nuts etc. the possibilities are endless...)

Method:

1. In a pan melt the butter, sugar, golden syrup and cocoa powder together, stirring to make sure it doesn't burn, don't allow to boil.

2. Crush up the biscuits, they can range in size but you don't want any bigger than a 5p piece roughly or you'll get gaps in the base.

3. Add the crushed biscuits and the raisins to the melted mixture (if you have extra sauce add a biscuit or 2 more to make it a bit stiffer).

4. Spoon mixture into a 9x9 inch pan and press down firmly until evenly spread in the pan and flat. (You can add grease proof paper to be able to take it out of the pan just for convenience, but it doesn't need greasing)

Something like this...

5. Melt the milk chocolate and pour over the mixture. If using a combination of white chocolate too, pour in horizontal lines of white chocolate down the milk chocolate, then using a cocktail stick or something of that shape 'draw' vertical lines down the chocolate, causing a pattern to form.

6. Place in the fridge to set for an hour then cut into pieces.

7. Then enjoy!  

I might do another recipe post soon as we have our baby shower/leaving party next week that I'm going to be doing lots of baking for! :D

Baby Envy

Over the last two days HRH The Duchess of Cambridge has given birth to the next-next heir to the throne and two friends have given birth to a baby girl and boy. Seeing the gorgeous photos of their brand new babies has made me even more excited for our baby and very jealous that their waiting is over. And then there are another two friends who are due this week and next!

We also spent the last couple of days with Ethan's family up north and one of his cousins has a cute 8 month old daughter and his other cousin has 2 year old and 10 months old boys who are also ridiculously cute! While we were there they kept telling us how much we are going to love being parents and how wonderful it is! The end of October seems such a long time to wait for something so wonderful and life changing (a lot of hard work too I'm sure but 100% worth the lack of sleep etc). In reality it will probably go really quickly as our next month is jam packed with good things happening that will fill the waiting time and I'm sure you can never prepare too much for a new baby :)

Until then here are some photos from our weekend up north :)

Nancy working the sunglasses!

Ethan's interesting choice of attire for the day...

Seth, Kels and Rachel :) 

Ethan and Gabe playing 

Gabe dribbled right into Simon's mouth! (If you look closely enough or click on the photo you can see the dribble!)

The ball provided hours of entertainment haha

Ethan stole Barney's hat I think

SO cute!

Seth and Barnaby

Introducing Our Baby Dragon!

I feel its time to officially introduce the world to baby dragon. We've nicknamed the baby this since the very beginning when we found out but for some reason we've only really used the phrase around our families. At the beginning it was our way of making the abstract idea of a baby that we could neither see or feel a bit more personal and real, but now it's just our little affection way of referring to our little baby!

It started because when we were living in our flat we didn't use the heating over winter because the radiators we had were pathetic so it seemed a waste of money to use them. So often when we'd breathe out you'd get the steam or whatever it was appear that made you look like a dragon which led to Ethan naming me Jo the dragon, leading to baby dragon :) 

And today our little baby dragon is 26 weeks, which means the third trimester has started! Amusingly we had a midwife appointment last week and somehow I had managed to lose count of the weeks and thought I was 24 weeks and was actually 25 which was a very nice surprise, it felt like I had been told I was only to be pregnant for 39 weeks rather than 40 which is always a nice surprise because 40 weeks is a long time to be waiting for our beautiful baby! 

So I've decided the best way to get through these next 3 months is to not keep track of the weeks and then suddenly I'll have the baby and think 'oh are those 3 months over already?' ...haha something tells me that is not going to happen! 

The second trimester has been everything people say it is. I've been felling great, no sickness, aches or anything unpleasant, my bump has started growing and my hair started to be in really good condition (I only need to wash it twice a week now, it's wonderful!) and lots of people said I was blossoming which was just lovely to hear! 

However in the last 2 or 3 weeks my ribs and coccyx have started aching whenever I'm sat down and my back has just started aching a lot, particularly when I'm sat down or laying down. And sadly I imagine its only going to get worse as baby dragon grows more over the next 3 months! 

The good thing is it's definitely worth it, we cannot wait for our gorgeous baby boy to come, we already have so much love for him but apparently that feels like nothing compared to the love you feel for the baby once it's born! We genuinely can't wait! :)

3000!

My blog reached 3000 views today! This is probably not that many to most people that have blogs, but it makes me really happy because I never expected anyone to read it accept maybe Ethan and my sister... Haha!

For some reason the photo wouldn't crop, my apologies.. But look 3015 views!

And I know it's not them looking at my blog 3000 times just to make me happy as there are views from all sorts of places like Russia, I don't know anyone in Russia! So if you're reading my blog from another country (or from the UK) I think you should comment as to why you are currently reading this post (although you have to have a Google account to comment I think so I won't hold it against anyone for not commenting...)

34 views from Russia, 23 from Italy, 11 from the Netherlands! Crazy!

School Regret...

I had the best friends when I was at school, we use to have such fun! But when we all finished our GCSEs some went to College and others went to Sixth Form and so in school (for me in 6th form) our friendship groups changed slightly but not enough to stop spending time outside of school all together. However for some reason I decided that as we got older we kind of drifted apart as we had different interests etc and I had lots of church friends that I enjoyed spending time with. In reality we never actually drifted apart, I think I had decided once we left for uni I would never really see them again so there wasn't much point in making an effort to remain good friends with them, so when they made plans I would often come up with an excuse or something to the point that I think they gave up asking me in the end (which was quite fair enough). (Also that makes me sound as though I just sat at home on my own all the time, that's not true, I just spent way more time with my YSA friends). I think I felt that because they were going out and dressing up etc which is something that I didn't really do, that I wasn't as 'cool' as them and that I didn't quite fit in as well as I had done when we were younger. But in reality they totally respected who I was and that I didn't drink alcohol and probably thought no less of me for not doing those kind of things, but I just let myself think that they thought that because it was easier I guess.

These were some of my best friends at school, it's telling that the most recent photo that I can find is of our year 11 prom. I'm hoping they won't hate me for including it... haha

It's only now that I have started to realise what a sad unnecessary thing that was! It might be because being married and expecting a baby does change the life you're living, with more responsibilities and having more than yourself to think about, that I've realised that in honesty the likelihood of me ever 'reconnecting' with my old friends has gone down heavily, which is actually a really sad thought! Also Ethan still keeps in contact with a lot of his friends from when he was at school (in fact we just had a lovely day with one of his old friends today!) even though he finished school 4 years ago and still has a really good relationship with those friends. Whereas I on the other hand, have only really kept in contact with my best friend that I've basically grown up with and even then I distanced myself from her for a good while too!

I don't really know what the point of this post is, other than maybe hope that some of my old friends might read it and know that I genuinely did value our friendship. It's also made me realise that you don't have to have the exact same interests to be friends, it just brings variety and different view points and thoughts that can enrich friendships. If I could re do my last few years in school I would do it completely differently! But I can't, so maybe from now I'll make more of an effort with the wonderful friends that I have now, particularly as we leave the country for a year :)

14 Things That Create a Marriage Full of Happiness!

Over the last few weeks I've been thinking about why I love being married to Ethan and originally I thought how lucky we were in 'finding' each other to be able to have the relationship we have. However after thinking about it a bit more I realised that is it actually nothing to do with luck but rather the way we treat and value our relationship. For this reason I thought I would make a little list of things that I think have made all the difference in creating a marriage full of complete happiness! Now I know everyone is different and what works for some people doesn't work for others, there are so many ways to create a happy marriage, these are just some of the things that I have found work for us. I also know that we have only been married for 8 months, which in the grand scheme of things is an incredibly short amount of time, however a good marriage has to start somewhere. It shouldn't have to become a 'good marriage' over time (although I'm sure it will only get better if we continue to make it a priority), surely you can make it happy from the very beginning through the things that you do and the way that you treat each other. Anyway, enough of me trying to justify why I have written this post, here is my list of 14 things... :) (I will admit a couple are ideas that we have seen on the internet that we have adjusted to work with our relationship, but they can all be found on my pinterest http://pinterest.com/jocwilkinson/eternal-happiness-aka-marriage/)

1. We put each other first and make each others happiness our own.
I think this is one of the most important things, if I've been able to make Ethan happy during the day then it's been a good day. One of my favourite things is doing something that I know will make Ethan happy particularly when he's not expecting it like getting some Cadbury giant buttons for him in my way home or  making the house (or currently our room as we're living with friends over the summer) all tidy before he comes home from work. The wonderful part is that it's mutual. Today for example, Ethan knows I love watching Wimbledon, and so he encouraged me to go downstairs and enjoy it while it's on rather than be productive like he was being. So I spent a good couple of hours watching Wimbledon whilst painting my nails (something I do every year whilst watching Wimbledon for some reason) thinking that Ethan was just doing the bits and pieces that he needed to get done. At 6.30 Ethan came in to the living room which I expected to be so that we could decide what we wanted to have for dinner and then we'd make it, but instead Ethan came in with dinner all made! (A delicious pasta and meatballs). Not only had he done that but he had also hoovered the room, sorted the washing and put the clean bedding back on the bed all without me knowing so I could enjoy Wimbledon! I felt so loved!

Which leads me to my second point...
2. We make a point of asking how each of us have felt loved.
We vary in how regularly we ask each other, sometimes once a week and other times a few days in a row but its such a good thing because I find it allows me to think back over all the kind things Ethan has done because its easy to either forget or not notice and it also reminds me that I definitely am loved. It also means we are able to show our appreciation for things that we do for each other and show that we don't take for granted the little things that each of us do for each other.

3. Don't criticise.
This was something I learnt by experience. There is more than one way of getting things done and just because you do it one way doesn't make a different way better or worse. By criticising the way someone does something not only do you probably offend your spouse, but you're also not appreciating the effort they have made for you. I've decided that it is 10 times better to show my appreciation when Ethan does something for me and enjoy the fact that we do things differently rather than be critical because I pridefully think that my way is better.

4. Praise and be grateful.
When Ethan does something that I am grateful for or has done something really well I don't just think it, I make sure I say it and vice versa. It makes my day when Ethan says he's proud of me for doing something or is really thankful for something that I have done or says how beautiful I look that day :)

5. Companionship inventory.
This is something that Ethan did on his mission, which again is something we don't do too often but it's really good when we do. It is basically a time where we are both able to bring up anything that we feel that either of us could maybe work on or change, but because it is said in the context of companionship inventory it is very building and completely non critical so neither of us come away feeling negative. In fact, I often feel very positive about whatever we have talked about! We tend to do it in quite an informal way and often without planning to, by asking things like 'What can I do slightly better?' or 'What do I do that you would rather I didn't?' etc. which has lead to use realising that one of us didn't like it when the other said a particular word and other little things that you wouldn't always mention to avoid causing offence. By reviewing our relationship every now and then it avoids explosive arguments when things have been held in.

6. We laugh.
This might seem a bit pointless or obvious but I think its really important to be able to just laugh and have fun, which we do a lot! There are plenty of things in life to be serious about so it's the best to be able to come home to Ethan and be able to laugh and be silly when we want. We have had our fair share of sock fights and 'sumo wrestles' in our times. I married my best friend who is always able to make me laugh, I think marriage should definitely be full of laughter! :)

7. We make the effort to understand how each other 'work'
For example, when I'm really tired I get very irrational and everything becomes a really big deal but by the morning I'm completely happy and rational again. When we were first married theses irrational moments would lead to Ethan spending a good while trying to calm me down which in reality never really worked too well because I was so tired and just would not be thinking reasonably in any way. Now however, Ethan knows if I get upset about something late at night when I'm really tired all he needs to do is cuddle me as talking never solves anything and by the morning I'm completely happy again :)

8. Give affection freely.
I don't think you should ever have to work for affection, it's just not kind. Give affection freely, it makes you feel so much more loved when affection is shown often and is not based on any conditions or terms.

9. Pray together.
I think almost every evening before we go to sleep we pray together, I think we have only missed one or two nights since we have been married. I don't think I can actually go to sleep now without doing so. It's a lovely time in which we are able to express our gratitude for the things that have happened that day, pray for our baby, our families, our relationship, each other and anything else. It is also a humbling time, as mentioned in number 7, when I'm tired I'm not a very nice person to be around sometimes and I often get very grumpy, but you can't pray when you're grumpy! So whatever it is that I am making a fuss about I often realise isn't important and quickly stop being grumpy and we go to sleep happy :)

10. Avoid heated arguments.
Everyone are bound to have disagreements at some point, but they don't have to be heated, angry arguments where unkind words are spoken and voices are raised. If there is something that Ethan and I disagree on we generally try and just talk about it in a gentle loving way. I remember when we were dating there was something that we weren't agree on yet we were still sat holding hands whilst being unimpressed with each other! Every now and then I will sulk for a little bit (I'm quite good at that! Haha) but after a few minutes I go and cuddle Ethan and apologise to each other as it's just not a nice feeling not being happy with each other and 'peace is restored in the Wilkinson household' as Ethan would say :) Never hold grudges, they are not kind or nice for anyone involved, even if you feel justified in your reasoning!

11. Talk!
Talk about everything and anything! Your hopes, dreams, fears, worries, and all the little things in between. I'm pretty certain that it is a lie when people say women are mind readers, I know I'm definitely not! So I really appreciate it when Ethan tells me how he is feeling about something because the chances are I have no idea! We are both so much more able to respond to each other's needs when we actually KNOW what those needs are. There is also something very comforting that comes from knowing that you can tell your spouse anything that is worrying or troubling you, but I think that only comes from having built up a trusting relationship though talking about the little things as well as the big :) It is also incredibly bonding and brings a lovely spirit when we talk about things relating to church, such as what we have read in the scriptures that day or talking about a lesson we have been in on sunday or a lesson that either of us are planning. Some of my favourite conversations have been when we have been talking about gospel topics :)

12. Our relationship is OURS!
So no one else should be involved. We both have wonderful parents who we both love very much, however our relationship is ours not theirs and so they don't interfere or take sides or anything like that. The relationship each of us have with our parents should never cause the other to feel threatened or of lesser importance in anyway. I love my parents and siblings so much but my husband is my first priority and no one comes before him. From what I've seen when other people start getting involved in other people's relationships either family or friends, that's when things start getting messy.

13. Live within your means.
This is one that might not be so obvious but again I think is very important. There is a great amount of peace and happiness that can come from knowing that you are living within your means with no debt. (Now both Ethan and I are students, so we have student finance debt, but that is unavoidable if you want to go to university so I will ignore that). We do not spend more than we have by using the generous overdrafts that we have access to as students and even have savings! We are sensible in the way we spend our money which means we are able to treat ourselves to dinner out or other things that we enjoy every now and then. Living in debt can bring so much unnecessary stress to a marriage that can be VERY detrimental.

14. Intimacy.
I wasn't going add this one as it's way more personal than the rest, but it is SO important that I couldn't not. But developing an intimate relationship that is full of love and trust is just so important. It is also beneficial to be able to talk openly and comfortably about it, which is actually not very easy sometimes. We have found a book that my mum gave us when we got married called 'And They Were Not Ashamed' by Laura Brotherson really good for prompting conversation where we can openly talk about it without feeling uncomfortable in any way. But I shall leave it at that as it is a rather personal thing.

I could carry on for days I think, I have already been writing this over 3 days (admittedly I have been watching Wimbledon each time I have been writing) but these are some of the things that I think are so important for our relationship and have contributed to it being a marriage full or more happiness than I ever expected! :)

He makes my life such a beautiful place!